My Most Intentional Battle

In one month, I will no longer have a "single digit" child.... There I said it! In a short time Connor turns 10 and will join Ashley in the realm of double digits. Time flies when you're having fun! It seems like it was days ago that Connor was living the "stay at home" life while his big sister went to her first day of school! Here we are, next week our schedule will be filled with volleyball games, baseball practice, piano lessons, children's choir, along side of all of our normal schedules... Knew this day was coming, I have seen so many families juggle this one over the years (some more successfully than others), to be honest with you...I am as excited as I have ever been!

I love my kids. I want them around, I want to spend time with them at every age of life. Oh, that temptation has been there at every stage to selfishly try to stop their maturing. To freeze them in a stage that I am enjoying so much. The battle with guilt over opportunities missed has stood at my door tempting me many times...whispering all that I didn't do or all that I am going to lose. I realized a while ago that this is the enemy. His goal is to distract me from being the parent I have been called to be, so that my kids won't get the godly example in the moments God has ordained for us.

I don't want time to drag, I want to squeeze every drop out of every moment and when that moment is gone, I want to squeeze the next one. Doing this is the most difficult, intentional, and rewarding battle that I have ever engaged in. There are so many times I am reminded by the Holy Spirit to parent my kids for the glory of God. Those times when I am tired, feeling down, irritable, or just plain selfish wanting to make much of what I want to make much of. Those times are the times when I must make an extra effort, as Paul writes in Philippians, to "take every thought captive before The Lord." 

Are my actions going to be subject to the King of Glory? Who do these children really belong to anyway? Who's image do they bear? Who do I want people to see when they see my kids? The answer to all of these questions is, "You Lord, they are Yours!" I don't say this with a tear or with sadness, but with all joy! I am raising my children stand firm, to make the most of every opportunity, to listen to God's voice, to mature in their physical and spiritual life of faith, and to be honest, the instructors God has given them are Christi and me. This means living my faith to the fullest. Running hard after God no matter how I am feeling or what struggles I am in. If I am going to intentionally fight this battle to help equip my kids to be all that God has made them to be, then I must model that battle in my own life, and I must believe it for me too. 

It isn't easy. My mistakes are plenty, both as a person and a parent. The reality is, when I am struggling with what to do, how to parent, or even how to discern if my feelings are godly or not...I don't need to look in the mirror, read a blog (the humor in that just struck me), get Facebook opinions, or even talk to my parents...I first must put both hands around the battle that I am in, wrestle it down, and make it submit to the King of Kings....my Lord. I believe with all that I am, that when I do this, He will never lead me astray. 

Why do I believe this? Why do I honor His leading/advice more than any other? Because He is my Father. He wants better for me than I want for myself...His love for my family makes my love look dead and dried out. So join me, cut the ropes that you have been holding onto your children with, and "delight yourself in The Lord...He will give you the desires of your heart" (and you'll love every minute of it!)

I want you to know everything-

A few minutes after Christi and I began our morning run, she looks to me and says, "you're calling me." I said,"That's strange, because I am listening to the radio on my phone right now." Well, it was my son Face Timing Christi from my IPad. He wanted to speak with me. 

"Dad, I can't find the remote..." We had been wrestling earlier (a lot of that type of good father/son bonding happens in the Adams' household), and he said that he knew where it was before we wrestled, but now he couldn't find it. He had gone through the normal routine of where it could be and was out of ideas. 

What was my response? "Bud , I am out running. I don't know where it is. I can't see it. What do you want?"  What he said brought a smile to my face.

"Dad, I want you to know everything."

What an amazing admission...I wish I knew everything, but I don't. As parents, dads imparticular, we do all that we can to have the answer to every solution for our kids and family. I think sometimes, if we are honest with ourselves, we would have to admit that we find a lot of value in having an answer for every situation. Problems at school, work, with friends...we love being the goto guys. Ok, maybe I can't speak for you, but I know this is true for me. 

What happens when I have taught my family that I am the answer man, and the day comes when I have to admit...I don't know it all. I don't have all of the answers. What then? That's called a crisis of belief. That's what happens. The foundation of trust and belief that others have built upon...cracked and damaged.

After Connor said that he wanted me to know everything, by God's grace, I answered, "I do too, buddy, but only God knows everything, He's the only dad with all of the answers. I will help you look when I get home."   In that moment, I made a two confessions: I don't know it all and I know who does. 

It is our job, our privilege, as parents to make much of God to our spouse and children. I think we need to recognize every opportunity to do this. Even those times, when we swell up with pride (like I did this morning) when those we love confess how much they rely on and believe in us. It is ok to feel good, to enjoy that trust. 

We have to remember what The Lord spoke in Isaiah chapter 40:28, "Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the Everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable."

Next time you don't know the answer, don't hang your head low, lift your eyes up! 

Don't Neglect the Little Things

Christi and I have had a busy summer. Our kiddos were gone for a couple of weeks to the grandparents...I would love to tell you how much free time we had---romantic dates every night and all---but our calendar didn't free up that much!

What we did do though makes us scratch our heads. You see when we moved into our new home 8 years ago, we painted every wall, waxed every floor. We were "Gung-ho" taking care of everything, big and small to make our home look its best.

Well, 8 years later, we had done very little. Paint is dirty from raising 2 kids. Chipped paint marks where chairs have hit the wall one too many times. Tiles that have been cracked since year 2 still mark the floor. Dirty grout marks the kitchen floor and ice falls out of the refrigerator ice maker onto the floor because the guide for the ice has long been broken.

How did it get this way? I mean to the average visitor, you might not notice these things, but to us...they have been more than prominent. Well, this summer we finally decided to try and tackle this list. No kidding, a couple of weeks are gone and this list no longer exists! Everything is cleaned, repaired or replaced!

So why do we scratch our heads when we think about it? Well, we never tackled these things because we thought they would either be out of our skill set or take more time than we had. We have lived with a mess in our house, inconveniences in the kitchen, all because we weren't willing to try the fixes because they APPEARED to be too much for us to tackle.

You know where I'm going with this! Yeah, think of all the little things in your life of faith that you have simply not tackled over the years. All the different areas of your life you have not opened the door to for the Holy Spirit simply because that area APPEARS a little too big of a task to deal with right now.

I bet we share a lot in common. When we first believed, we were "Gung-ho" about letting the Holy Spirit do major overhauls in our life. Over time, we just have gotten tired and overwhelmed at the thought of what it would take to get that area of faith/life back to the full beauty God intends for it. Well, let me give you a word of encouragement. It's not gonna take much! Jesus gave us the Holy Spirit as our Helper and guide. It is He who works in you and through you. If He can revive a dead soul and bring it back to life...well those nicks and cracks in your life of faith are a cakewalk. The reality is, you just have to open the door and let Him work - though you, through others around you, through His power!

      “But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you. -(Jn 14:26)

Take a moment today. Take account of the areas of your life of faith you have neglected a little more than you wish you would have. Then, in obedience to Christ and by the power that comes by the Holy Spirit, knock those items that have been bugging you off your list. It feels great, I promise!  

Stop Running with Weights on your Legs!

Another "jog/walk" today. June really threw our schedule off. Between VBS, Camp and rain...we majorly missed our goals! So July we determined to start off differently. It has been going pretty well, until today!

I had a great idea: Walk for 1/2 mile, then run all out for a 1/2 mile...wash rinse repeat until we got home. Sounded like a great idea at the time. The first run was fast (for us) and it felt great! Then the next walk happened. What happened was amazing. My speed at walking was at a pace 2 min/mi slower than my first leg. Before I knew it, it was time to run again. This pace was almost 3 min/mi slower than my first run! My good idea was not working.

I felt great as I prepared for the run and the sprint of the first 1/2 mi was awesome, but after that it felt like I had a 10 pound weight on each leg. It didn't matter if I was walking or running...it was harder than normal. I wasn't that winded. My pulse wasn't racing, my legs were just dragging.

As I muscled through it the Lord kept bringing to mind how often we do this in our Christian walk. Have you ever felt the tug of God on your life? Maybe multiple times throughout life? You "stretch" out and prepare for His Direction, then He gives you a glimpse of His plans and "Pow!"... it's like you just heard the starting gun go off at an Olympic sprint...you're off! It feels great running so hard for the Lord. The only problem is after a short time, you need a break, your spiritual legs feel like weights are on them, and all of the sudden not only are you "not sprinting" you are hurting, tired, and questioning the Lord.

 In this time ask yourself, "Did God ask you to Sprint? Did he ask you to follow or lead?" Sometimes we are so "ready" to be done waiting that when we get a glimpse of God's plan we take off with a smile...but if God isn't finished speaking, then we are running FROM Him not FOR Him. (and we don't even know it!)

The word persevere ran through my head as I struggled with my legs!

Over and over in scripture God calls believers to persevere! His desire isn't for a man who tires himself out with short sprints of faithfulness, but a man who steadily follows the PACE that God, Himself set for him. 

Pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching; persevere in these things, for as you do this you will ensure salvation both for yourself and for those who hear you.

1 Timothy 4:16

 

I see way too many brothers and sisters in Christ running their spiritual life, looking like they are toiling with weights on their legs as they make their way. You can take those off now. Our race is a long one, not a sprint. Persevere, listen closely and let God set your pace!

 (You get to the goal MUCH quicker!)

 

Enduring the Heat

It is getting hot in Houston! In reality, I think a lot of people are struggling with the heat in a different way. I was reading Psalms 119 this morning (yeah, the really long chapter!) and stumbled across v. 83. It says:

               Though I have become like a wineskin in the smoke, I do not forget your statutes

Now, quite honestly, I have never seen a wineskin in smoke, but as I considered what The Lord wanted to convey to me...the imagery was pretty beautiful. When that wineskin hit the smoke and the heat, it was enduring a process. The heat has to be enough to produce smoke, but not so much that it would scorch the wineskin. In order to dry the wineskin out, it was going to have to endure the heat and smoke slowly, over a period of time before it would be pulled out.

How many times have you felt like you are suffocating in the smoke produced by the heat, the trials in your life? Have you been caught in a time of pressure, not so much to destroy you, but enough to wear you down? Maybe the worst part of it all is that it feels like you have been in the smoke and heat forever with no end in sight. Every Christian I know (me included) has faced times like this. The temptation is to quit or take matters into your own hands. To give God an ultimatum...you have been holding out for as long as you can, and He hasn't pulled you out...so you take matters into your own hands. 

I know this temptation...failed that that test a few times.

                                   But we need to see things as they are, not as we feel. 

How? The Psalter says," I do not forget your statues!" Better yet, in verse 97 he puts it this way, " O how I love your law! It is my meditation all the day!" Or maybe you know verse 105 better, " You word is a lamp into my feet or a light to my path." I told Ashley I was in Psalms 119 this morning as I was walking out the door and she says, "have you gotten to verse 109 yet!" "My life is conintually in your hand, Yet I do not forget your law!"

The way that we endure, even find delight in our long trials, droughts, and tribulations is to be saturated by the Word of God. Being filled with his Word is like constantly filling a wineskin with moisture as it spends time in the heat. You won't become brittle...you won't scorch, you won't even dry out because the well spring of living water that is saturating your life. 

I can't tell you when a trail, especially a long one, will end. One thing I can be sure of is that when those trials are upon you...seek God in His word, and follow the light it puts out in your life...it may only be a lamp unto your feet or it could be a bigger light unto your path. Either way, it will always be enough! 

Are you Running Behind?

Many of you know that Christi and I have started running together since March. We have run over 100 miles since we returned from Israel! This is a big deal for both of us! If you would have met Christi when I did (5th grade Sunday School) you would have never thought that a word that would one day describe her is "runner." We love joking about it! I really am not a big fan of running either. I know I need to stay fit and I know that being disciplined in areas that I am not naturally disciplined is a big deal!

That said, Today I needed to be in the office a little early. So when we went running, we didn't have time to do our normal route. As we are running (Christi starts in the lead, and about half way through we switch places), about 1/2 mile in Christi turns around, begins jogging in place, waiting for me to catch up. When I get close enough she asks, "What do you want to do? Which way do you want to go?" Basically, Lead me...

No kidding, I as saw my wife jogging in place, waiting for me to catch up so that I can lead, the Lord opened my eyes! How many times do men (me included) let their wives lead and are happy just to follow? How many wives are running in place hoping that their husbands will get close enough simply to shout out some little bit of leadership in their family life, in their spiritual life?

I think between the shouting of the world at how unimportant gender roles are and the comfortable spot of not having to lead that many men find themselves in...we are leaving our wives out on a limb. They are stunting their spiritual growth because they are waiting on us. Having a good idea of what the plan should be, but longing for their partner, their husband to utter the words and lead.

Listen to what the Lord says in 1 Peter 3:7--

Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

 

Men, we are not to put our wives out there to test the waters (Like Jacob did with his as he was approaching Esau). We are to show them honor! We are to value, lead, and protect them as we would a fragile, expensive, valuable vessel.  We can't do that from the back of the pack. We can't do that by letting our wives go their own way or even by letting them run in place. 

 

Maybe our prayers are being hindered by our lack of leading and caring for our wives. So let's neglect the movements that devalue God's commands for us. Let's be a little more disciplined in our lives so that we aren't always playing catch up with our wives. Pick up the pace, dare to lead and put yourself out there first... 

 



Late Night Revelations

Just a little insight into me, I cannot eat dinner late at night, it keeps me from sleeping.

Throughout my life I have had countless nights where I woke up an hour or two into my rest and couldn't go back to sleep. If I am being honest, one of the things I look forward to in heaven is that my body won't need the rest that it needs today, and that there is no night! Christi and I talk about this a lot, because she loves sleeping!

One of the reasons I have an aversion to the night is because of my lack of rest many nights. I will wake up and then for 2-3 hours will sit in the silence and think. I think about all kinds of things: that are weighing me down, things that need to be done, and even things out of my influence. I have told myself many times to "stop thinking" so that can go back to sleep...yeah, that never works!

Over the past year or so I have decided that when I have restless nights, I have to focus on something and not just random thoughts. So I open my Bible and look for the RED LETTERS. Well, last night was a RED LETTER night. I read Matthew 9, a passage that I have read any times, but really landed on Matt. 9:37-38.
It says:
                The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few, 
                    therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.

Every good pastor knows this passage and loves it, but last night I was caught by the word "earnestly." I don't know if it is because I learned it first in the KJV that says "beseech the Lord," but I wanted to know what the deep meaning of that word earnestly was. So I looked to see what the word was in the Greek. Well, I found that the word earnestly wasn't there. It was simply a word that the translator used to unpack and give the meaning of what Jesus was trying to convey. The Greek word is deomai which means to pray or plead. When I looked deeper into things, I found that the majority of the time this word was used in scripture that it was translated "to beg or begged." This is where the Lord moved in me...

He is calling me to be a beggar! As a pastor I find myself constantly praying for a harvest! Yet, Jesus tells me that what I am praying for is already there! I am praying for the wrong thing! Instead of begging Him for a harvest, I need to be begging Him to send out laborers into the harvest! ME! I need to plead with and beg God to let His kingdom come, and plead for the grace and mercy to be one who labors with the bountiful harvest that He has prepared!

This has changed the way that I will move forward. I don't know how long I begged the Lord to send out laborers, specifically this laborer, last night, but I fell asleep doing it.

It is strange when you realize that a passionate prayer that you have been praying was the wrong prayer. It is also wonderful when the Grace of God wakes you up in the night to fix you and set you on His course...

I want to be a beggar. The Harvest is already plentiful....just not enough beggars...